Friday, August 13, 2010

Yesteryear:

We all find time during the course of the day to actually breathe, relax, forget about work, and do something to treat ourselves. Typically, I reach my "peaceful" moment right before bed. There is nothing better to me then bringing a book or some magazines to bed with me along with some tea. I turn on a dim light, I fluff the pillows, and I read and sip my tea. Lately I've been reading National Geographic Traveler, because quite frankly, I am desperately yearning for a trip. I miss the days of packing my back pack for Thailand, climbing temples in Cambodia, and frolicking in the streets of Paris. Now, my life is comprised of bills, work, and stress. The thought of an exiting getaway is less than realistic at the present time. What happened to that simple life that I use to love so much? Unfortunately, every night before I go to bed, this is the time that I dream a little too big.

I've been thinking a lot lately about who I am, where I came from, and how much I've changed over the past few years. I've always been an advocate that "change" is good and sometimes even necessary. Although I'm constantly working toward reaching my happy place, I still don't think I'm actually there. Living abroad for three years definitely helped me make progress, but I want more. I need more time out of my comfort zone.

I continuously think about what I want long term: a house, a companion, a dog, a family. It's during my peaceful moment before bed that I wish I had someone to look over at, to kiss good night, and to wake up next to. As cliche as it all sounds, maybe my peaceful place is just a reminder of where I am right now in my life.

However, I also continuously think about where I want to be right now: in a hammock on the beach in Fiji, on a safari in Africa, hiking in South America. I think about quitting my job, maxing out my credit cards, and just traveling for a year or more. I know that I lived abroad for 3 years, and I was able to travel extensively, but I feel like I only saw a fraction of what is out there. Once you start traveling it is so hard to stop. Once you discover that there is so much more out there then the town you grew up in, it's difficult to not want to see those places. I have never been a small town boy, and I always knew that I wouldn't stay where I grew up. Even though I've had the chance to see places that most people only read about, I still have a list a mile along of places I want to go.. things I want to see..

Maybe I need to embrace change even more. Take advantage of my new surroundings and live here in Seattle. In the meantime, I'm still yearning for so much.

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